COBRA ZZ

So, when we have our wedding, we’ll give everyone steak on the menu. Oh, I want a steak. I think we should give everyone a steak. Oh, yeah. I like steak, too. That’s my favorite. I like it medium rare. Oh, me too. I like medium rare also. 

What about prime rib? Mm, that would be good. I wonder if they have an Italian version of prime rib. We could do prime rib or steak. And then if they don’t eat beef, let’s do the chicken parmigiana. Chicken parmigiana is my favorite, oh. Oh, me too. And it’s gotta be with spaghetti. Oh, yeah, I do like it with spaghetti, too. But everyone’s gonna eat spaghetti. They are? Why? Because it’s Vatican spaghetti, baby. Everybody wants that Vatican spaghetti. Oh, yeah, I forgot, we’re getting married there. Vatican spaghetti for everybody. Oh, but what about a Vatican mustacholi? Oh, Vatican lasagna. Oh, it’s gonna be angel hair spaghetti, it better be if it’s from the Vatican. Now what I’m saying is, I know what you’re saying. 

Okay, so, what about if they’re a vegetarian? Well, then we gotta give them the Indian food. And don’t worry, it’s gonna have potatoes if you’re Irish. Winky wink, but not a winky wink on the potatoes, if you know what I mean. Why is he a winky wink? 

Well, I don’t know any Irish people that I would invite to this. I don’t know any good Irish people. All I know are bad Irish people. You know the ones that be the Irish bad word. Mafia. Oh, that’s true. Do you think they would want that bad word potato in there? What’s a bad word potato? French fries? 

Oh yeah. We should have hamburgers for the little kids that come there to the Vatican wedding. You don’t think they would eat that Vatican angel hair spaghetti? 

Yeah, they’ll eat it, but you know kids. They want like a little spaghetti, a little hamburger, a little, what do they call those cups with the pudding in them? Snack pack. What a snack pack. What a food it is, huh? Oh, a little milk, milk in a little wooden carton. A little milky milk in a carton. Oh, I like spaghetti. And I get a little milky milk in a carton. And I drink it, too. I mean when I eat the spaghetti. Me too, me too. 

Oh, what’s the dessert? That’s a wedding cake. We give them a take-home wedding cake snack. Like a little souvenir snack. Wedding dessert. Yeah, we like have them all individually wrapped with the cake on it. Like, here’s your wedding snack pack. And everybody can have their name on those. And it’s not like a stupid cupcake. It’s like their own little cake they take home. Yeah, their own little cakes. 

How are you going to take it on the plane, though? What do you mean? You just pass it through the scanner. There’s no metal in it. We’re not trying to sneak a little nail file into the cake. That’s true. That’s true. I’m gonna be full of them. I don’t know. You know we’re on cake. 

I want you to kiss me like this. I do want you to kiss me like this. I mean, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat. 

You know I’m a bad boy, and I love cash money. I don’t wanna take your presents home with me from the Vatican. It’s cash only. Wedding presents I’m talking about. Unless it’s a car. We’re only taking cars and cash. And the car, it better be a cool car. That’s all we’re saying. If it’s a cool car, I’ll take it. We don’t care what kind of car it is, as long as it’s a cool car. 

And if you wanna put some cameras and recordings in there, like well, we’ll still keep those intact. We don’t mind if you’re watching us when we’re driving around in there. If it’s the one you gave us, that’s fine. But then, you know, when we’re on our car show, we could be like, oh, we got this car from so-and-so at our wedding in the Vatican. They didn’t bring it, they just gave us a picture of the car in one of those plastics. 

Like, you know, those pictures he was trying to sell, but not sell, but just show them off, you know? Like, oh, I got all these pictures of you, you sexy little thing. Can you please come see me? 

See me? Like, wait for me in the ER. I mean, wait for me in the hospital waiting room because you love me, love me so much. Can you wait for me there and then I see you when I’m done? Oh my God, it’s my girlfriend. I mean, it’s my wife. I don’t know what to call you. You are just my lover, my wife, there waiting with me. 

Oh my God. I miss you so much. You are very nice to me right now. There’s only so much I can pretend, you know? I know I want to fuck you so bad.

So what did you think of the whole thing? I thought it was pretty sweet how you showed me all those Zippo lighters of the teams that I bought for you with the $4.3 trillion you sent me. That’s what I like to hear. Did you pay off everybody that I asked you to? Yes, I did. You know everything was partially fake after we left that section 8 apartment housing building, right? Yes, I know. You know everything now, do you? I know everything. You know how it all goes down? Yep. You such a lucky girl. You such a lucky girl. I know you are. You’re so lucky. So tell me, when are we gonna meet? I don’t wanna wait till we’re in Monaco. It’s gonna take so fucking long. Yeah? What do I need to do? First, get your finger fixed. Don’t worry about anything until that happens. Just focus on healing that first. Okay. I will. I’m glad you have that quarterback coach. She really knows how to make sure I don’t freak out. Yeah, she’s helping me a lot. Tell me, do you want me to do something for you? Oh yeah, I do always. Mm-hmm. Sure, why not?

We’re here at UDF, testing out the cappuccino. It’s the regular cappuccino. What do you think of it? I’m not there, I’m at Wawa getting a cigar. I thought I saw you go to the Casey’s. I was first, I went to the Casey’s. Then I switched cars and went to Wawa. Oh really? Well, I saw the Honda Civic gray pulling into Casey’s. And then I saw the Subaru Outback KCC on the plates heading towards Wawa. And then I pulled into the UDF and got the cappuccino. And then what happened? Oh, then the guy showed up and said build something. So then I was like, what do you want me to build? An enterprise? Ooh, like, what could I possibly build? There is some land available. Kind of looks like a hammerhead shark if you ask me. Are they trying to build a hammerhead shark over there? I don’t know, it looks like a hammerhead shark. You remember that thing in Moana with all the hammerhead sharks going crosstrack? And they all showed up and had a lot of beauty. Yeah, it kind of reminds me about using those true nails on the bad guy. What are we gonna do without true nails on the bad guys? Well, we got the guy in the red high-tops curb-stomping down the street, and the Irish lady in the silver truck just drove by. And then I saw purple on the sign for a split second. Now there’s a red, white, and blue on the sign. What could it mean? Looks like Joan of Arc likes a little, what do they call it, chewing tobacco in the back left pocket, I guess. Maybe that’s what that back left pocket Joan of Arc symbol means after all. Who knows? Who knows? I would recommend drinking two of those gator lights a day. I lost 50 pounds drinking those. I lost 50 pounds drinking those. You don’t know. I didn’t know they have free vacuums at UDF. Wow. Maybe I should vacuum my car. Man, I could dance like that too in front of a vacuum. That would be pretty fun. Man, I wish I could play with the vacuum too. Oh no, it’s an iPad. Man, it’s not a vacuum. It’s one of them. Looks like he’s taking a selfie or something. Reminds me of that time I was dating that girl, and her dad was best friends with the vice president, and then I told her I wanted to join the CIA and invent time travel, and then she gave me this phone. with the front-facing camera and I took the first selfies in front of the Eiffel Tower and the cathedral. Just hiding the cottage is fucking. Damn. I didn’t know we had those around. Good to know. Good to know. I’m having myself a little party at the gas station, you know. That’s what I like to do. Oh, you wanna see what I got? You wanna see what I got? Oh, I got you a collection of Zippos. Oop, oop, oop, oop, oop. You want me to make you a little video of it? OK. Okie dokie. I know you like a little jokey. I hope you don’t get mad. Don’t get mad. It’s just a jokey joke. It’s a just a jokey joke, OK? I’m gonna hold you. OK. Did I throw anything on the ground? No. Did not. I didn’t. OK. I’m gonna go and I’m gonna make something funny. Love you very quickly. OK. Hello, this is a different member. I’m here with another collection that we have. From the member of our mafia who, you know, had some stuff that he purchased for a woman, and, you know, he wanted to unload that stuff because the woman was apparently not interested or something. I don’t know. Anyways, we have a collection of Zippo lighters that he keeps in this. First off is a dragon. So I’ll put that one right there. Then we got Cincinnati Bengals. It’s a little scuffed up. I think it’s been used a little bit. Still pretty good. Let’s see this one. Yeah, they just need a light. They just need the fluid. Looks like he’s got a Detroit Lions, a little scuffed up there, but you know, it’s still brand new. I think he used it a couple times. You know how it is when you’re on. It’s got some issues. Oh, then he’s got that one for the Mexican basketball team. It still has a sticker on it. Yeah, the Mexican NBA team coming soon. Like I said, I know the cartel. I know the cartel. I know the cartel. Anyways, here we got the Chicago Cubs. There you go. It’s still brand new. He just put fuel in them once, he said. Oh, here we got a plain silver. We can put fuel in there. Here we got a… She got real bears. This one’s been used. I know that. It’s been around the block. It’s a little scuffed. But you know all those football ones that you have? Here we got the United States Navy. That’s a good one. So that’s been around the block. It’s definitely been around the Red October quite a bit, if you ask me. Yeah, this place to be around here. And here we got the gold lighter, as they say, you know, that song Gold lighter, whatever it is. Now, and last but not least, we got the gas station special. Although you probably still want that one, huh? Or maybe not, you don’t. You don’t like that guy, so don’t believe so many times. Anyways, those are the other items that are not for sale. Anyways, have a good day! You wanted to know what we do in the dark please? This is what we do in the dark. We just do it in the daytime now. Because the president’s in the mafia, duh. I mean, the former president’s in the mafia too, duh. And the one before that’s in the mafia too, duh. Which mafia? My mafia, duh.

So yeah, this lady-lady baby-baby dragon group shows up, right? And they’re all wearing like, fucking goofy-ass Monty Python outfits. They pulled up right in front of my condo. It was fucking crazy. And I’m like, what the fuck are you doing? Like, they pulled up like, and then they like, all got out of the car. And I was just like, what the fuck is this? And then they all like, spread out, walking around everywhere. I was like, who the fuck are these idiots? They look like complete douchebags. They look like they were fucking like, a bad high school version of like, Monty Python or something. It was so sad. And I was like, these are like, the fucking Knights of the round table. Like, who the fuck are these idiots? So apparently someone jacked your fucking Knights of the round table, Harry. Some like, low-class, low-class fucking British retards, man. And these faggots live in Chicago or something. I don’t even know. You know, once I was in the Jeep, this car, and like, Stalin was trying to like, jam my engine or something. Like, it wouldn’t fucking move out of park. And I was like, what the fuck? This Stalin is so schizophrenic, he can fucking fuck with mechanical things. So then I was like, talking to this mafia guy at a bar, and I was like, can you believe someone’s schizophrenia could be that bad that they fucking try to mess with mechanical things? Like, fuck that. I wonder if these shitheads are trying to like, blow up planes or like, divert planes or control them with their mind, these schizophrenic retards. We need to like, auto-inject these people with haloperidol, like, brrr, in the ass. We need to like, fucking auto-inject these people with Olanzapine, like, brrr, in the ass. Like, any of these schizophrenic retards that talk too much in their head, just give them an automatic 50 milligrams of Olanzapine in the ass, like, boom! Give them like, 50 milligrams of haloperidol in the ass, like, boom! Like, fuck these fucking shitheads. Like these fucking schizophrenic retards thinking they’re the Knights of the Round Table, thinking they can, like, make a car fly by making the windshield go wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Now my car is flying. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Now my car is flying to Chicago. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Now my car is flying into Chicago. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. 

You know, I had that happen once. I met Joan of Arc. She fucking rolls up to my, I was in the BMW, that one over there, and she’s like, walks up like, a nice chariot. And I’m like, what? She’s like, nice chariot. And I’m like, yeah, I guess it’s a chariot, thanks. And she’s like, remember me? And I’m like, no, I’ve never seen you in my life. She was just a cute chick. I was like, I don’t mind hanging out with you. And she’s like, cool. And then she, like, gets in the car, and she sits with, like, her back to the windshield, and she’s got her leg, like, up on the seat. And she’s like, I’m just, like, drinking a Stella. I was like on the sidewalk by the condo in Chicago. Yeah, I still have the condo, relax. I’m just visiting here while I’m doing all this bullshit. Anyways, so, uh, like, drinking a Stella. I’m like, you wanna beer? She’s like, I’ll have one. So I go grab a Stella. I grab one over there by the door to the fucking stairwell. So I grab this Stella. I grab a Stella. And I’m like, she takes one sip and she’s like, can we go upstairs? And I’m like, what? I’m like, or she’s like, can we go to your place? I’m like, we just opened these beers. It was like a nice night. I was like, out there popping fireworks. So I’m like, just let me let us finish this beer at least. And then she like tells me she wants to have sex and stuff, like, you know how they do that. So I’m like, all right, let’s get out of here. But I’m like, before we go watch this. So I grab this huge firework and I go light it off in the middle of the intersection. It goes boom! It just like echoes everywhere because there’s like tall buildings everywhere. It’s just echoing down the whole fucking street. Like boom! And then she’s like laughing and clapping, like how do I love it? So then we go back up to my place, right? And like she walks in and she’s like, wow, this is nicer than I thought it would be. And I’m like, what the fuck do you think I am? Like this is a BMW you just saw. Like what the fuck do you think this is? And she’s just like amazed by this condo. And then she’s like, here’s my stocking. And she shows me her stocking and it has like a rip on it. And I’m just like, what is this, like lost in translation? You remember that chick’s like, lip my stocking, lip my stocking. And I’m just like, what the fuck is this Joan of Arc bitch fucking telling me about a ripped stocking? Anyways, then we had sex a bunch of times and like, you know, I bought her a bunch of shit. And then like, you know, I gave her this gold chain and this like t-shirt, sweatshirt. And then like one day she’s like wearing, like, yeah, she stayed with me for like three days. So then one day she’s wearing like one of my shirts. And like the number on the shirt changed to 19. I’m like, what the fuck is this? It’s like, how did you change the number on the fucking jersey? That’s so fucking crazy that she did that. So then she’s like, you know, we need to get my car. And I’m like, what do you mean? And she’s like, well, I parked my car there. I think it’s crashed though. And I’m like, where’d you park it? And she’s like, some street like Cortez or something. I’m like, weren’t you at Club Debonair? Like, why the fuck would you park over there? Like, if you know Chicago, it doesn’t make any sense why she would park, like, west of Western when she’s fucking going to Debonair. And she parked south of Division. Like, I’m like, south of Division and west of Western going to Club Debonair. Like, it doesn’t make sense. She said her friend was DJing or something. So then we’re like driving around looking for this car. I think I had the Audi by that time. So I was driving like a manual transmission Audi around the city. And it had like all the paint job on there, like that blue paint. You know, like when I saw like, what’s her face? Anne Frank. Yeah, I saw Anne Frank. Her picture showed up on the hood when I put the paint and then Jesus Christ, Redeemer was on the back bumper. And then like, there was a bunch of other art. I took pictures of it all. It’s all in this art book I made. So anyways, I, uh, we’re driving around like, where the fuck is this street? Like, it didn’t show up on anything. And finally I find this street like jammed between two streets. It’s like, it doesn’t even make sense why it’s there. So then we go down the street and I see this tiny ass red car with like the front left wheel, like, completely smashed. But not that bad. Like, it could still drive, like, so she pulls it out. And then I call this tow truck and I’m like, well, let’s go to Delgado’s, you know, I usually took my ex-girlfriend’s car there. So we go to Delgado’s. Or I tried to put Delgado in the GPS and then it disappears. I’m like, what the fuck is this? And then, like, a tow truck comes up, but it’s like, not the one I called. And I’m like, why are you trying to tow her? I didn’t call you. And then he, he left. And then another guy came with the one I called. And I was like, who was that guy? So then that guy takes me to the Delgado, which I found in the real Delgado. And then we go to Delgado’s, and like, I’m driving this red car around, like, just to check it out. It’s like a little go-kart. So then finally I drop it off there. And then, um, you know, like, a day later, all of a sudden she gets up and starts, like, walking out of the condo. I’m like, where are you going? She’s like, oh, I gotta go. I’m like, what about your car? And she’s like, someone’s picking me up. And I’m like, what? So we go downstairs, and then, like, she’s just, like, walking off, like, just walking off. I’m like, there’s no car here to pick you up. Where the fuck are you going? So I just, like, followed her down the street. And then finally this car pulls up, and there’s like this ugly chick inside, and she’s like, says something weird to me. And I’m just like, what the fuck is this? And then Joan of Arc gets in the car, and I’m just like, brrr, I turned the bitch into a snake, the other bitch. And then the snake drove her home, like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I guess she kept the snake as her pet. That’s what she told me later. But yeah, I still see her big once in a while. She goes by Stef. S-T-E-F. I have her number somewhere. I tried calling her a couple times, like, a couple months later, just to see if she wanted to hang out again, but she didn’t pick up. We had a good time those three days. It was pretty fun. It was pretty fun. Oh, yeah, she wanted, like, this Mario some guy’s, like, facial body spray. She said it, like, freshens her up when she’s in battles or something. Yeah, here’s your infinity of that. Boom, there we go. Yeah, that’s what we do with, like, Merlin times, you know. Those are the Merlin, Merlin show, the Merlin show. Welcome to the Merlin show.

Hello, governor. Hello, governor. My name’s Dr. Merlin. Hello. What’s your name, patient? Oh, my name’s Sir Arthur. Oh, Sir Arthur, could you please tell me what’s troubling you? Well, you see, I was sitting around my round table, and I only had six spots. You know, I had one spot for myself, one spot for you, one spot for Sean Connery, one spot for Daniel Craig, one spot for Peter Griffin, one spot for Daniel Griffin, one spot for Griffin Griffin, one spot for Craig Griffin, one spot for Sean Griffin, and one spot for Connery Connery. There’s the extra seventh spot. I just gave it out. You know, we had nine spots at the table. And then, of course, the tenth spot was Guinevere. And then she would always bring those Rugrats in. And then, you know, once we were playing cards and uh you know, one of the Rugrats came in and said someone’s trying to attack the castle. And I said, we’re playing cards. Dust, dust, poof! And, you know, the so-and-so attacking the castle just turned into Dust Dust and then went Poof and disappeared. It was like Puff the Magic Dragon, I would say, you know. So, uh, you know, that’s what happened. And then, uh, you know, we kept playing cards and then we decided, you know, why don’t we go do some crusades and just dust, dust, poof everyone since it’s so much easier than using the swords. You know, the swords, you end up cutting yourself, you know? You end up cutting yourself when you’re playing with swords. You don’t always cut the enemy. Sometimes you cut yourself, you know? And while your sword’s gently weeping, you know, I don’t know what else to tell you. So, anyways, I ran into Guinevere the other day. I met her on something called the Internet. Yeah, she still looked good, still looked sexy. Don’t you think? Oh, quite. Quite sexy. So, anyways, I decided, you know, I would add some more spots at the table. Who was at our spots? Oh, we added six more spots. Vesper, M, Q. Who else? Oh, James Bond, Daniel Craig, and Sean Connery. And then, oh, yes, we had to add Peter Tosh, Bob Marley, Rita Marley, Damian Marley, Ziggy Marley, Jamrock Marley, and Bob Marley Jr. And then we added Rihanna, ASAP Rocky, Ice Cube, Snoop Dogg, Snoop Doggy Dogg, Snoop Lion, and Young Thug. And then we added, um, who else did we add at the table? Oh, who else did we need to hide from? Oh, let me think for a second. Oh, that was so fun playing those cards back in the day, don’t you think? We really had a good time back then. What were we playing? Oh, that game where you would put the cards above your ears and you looked like a little devil with horns. Yeah, yeah, that was a fun game. What was it called? You Curse? Why was it called You Curse? Oh, because we were doing all those curses on people, the dust dust poof curse while we were playing. Oh yeah, I remember. Yeah, yeah. And then they started thinking, you know, they could do it too. They started trying to put curses on people. And we were just like, what is this bullshit? You remember when I met you, right? Yeah, you pretended to be one of those homeless beggars in the street. And I said, King Arthur, what are you doing out here? And he said, how’d you recognize me, girl? You must be special. And you said, I am special. I know you’re the king. Why are you dressed like a homeless beggar? Well, I was actually looking for a wife. I wanted a woman who liked me when I was a homeless beggar instead of the king, you know. And then I heard about this thing called magicians. And you know, like all these guys were pretending to be magicians in the streets. And I figured, you know, as the king, might as well bring a magician into the, you know, court. So I might as well be the magician myself, you know. I’ll just go out here and act like a magician. That’s why I’m wearing this long coat and carrying this big stick. And, you know, I got this dog with me. And then I got a bunch of keys, too, you know, like, I got keys to some kind of vehicles that you never even seen before. You know what those keys were for? Those were for these two, that one, and that one. Yeah, they’re called the Saab 9000s. I keep them over here with the retired king and retired queen’s house. Yeah, they’re retired now over here. Yeah, they ain’t interested in that anymore. Me? Well, I’m not that interested. I’m more of an actor, comedian, joker, nightcrawler type guy now, you know? You know nightcrawlers? Those are those worms you put on the fishing hook and get any fish you want. Yeah, any fish you want. You just say, nightcrawler, get me a tuna. Got a tuna. Nightcrawler, get me a bass. Got me a bass. Boom, get a bong, get a bong, get a bong. Nightcrawler. I don’t know, I don’t really like any other fish. I’m not really into fish. They be eating poop and stuff in the water. I’m not interested in that. You know me, I prefer those Gatorlyte drinks. You know that Gatorlyte drink? It contains sodium, potassium, chloride, magnesium, calcium, extra, you know, stuff that your body needs for the Krebs cycle and glycolysis and fat metabolism. You know, I drank two of those a day for a month and I lost about 50 pounds. Believe it or not, 50 pounds. I know, you’re probably wondering what I looked like before. People were doing those curses on me, baby. Gwen, don’t you remember I told you they were doing all these curses on me? Anyways, girl, it’s good to see you. You look good. I can’t wait to see you when I see you. See you when I see you. What are we gonna do for dinner? Well, I don’t know. What was it you like? Red Lobsters? Yeah, we can go to the, there’s a whole restaurant called Red Lobster nowadays. Yeah, we can go there. I’ve been there before. I took some princess who saved her virginity from me there. Yeah. She didn’t know how to spread her legs, so I couldn’t fully deflower her. That was pretty recently. I don’t know. I think she stole one of the earrings back. I should say borrowed. I don’t know who else you’re gonna marry. Don’t you know that whole cross religion based on that Hinduism where the blue guy had 10 billion wives or something? 10 billion trillion wives. I don’t know how many he had, that blue guy. Yeah, he was doing about 10 billion wives of fucking, you know what I mean. Anyways, Gwynny, I’ll see you when I see you, okay? I know you’re not the striker anymore. You’re on the sideline. You’re just the coach. The striker coach. I know I got two strikers up there. Maybe three. I got three strikers up there. I got two for sure. Okay, I got two strikers. I’m playing defense. I’m not the goalie. Bidgoli’s in the goalie. Bidgoli’s in the goalie. Yeah, I got three strikers up there. Whoever. It doesn’t matter. We’re playing soccer. Hey, it’s an organization now, don’t you know? What do we call it, organization? Round table. Round table organization. You don’t wanna fuck with us. By the way.

Transcribe this. What makes this so infuriating is I told so many doctors about this, and none of them are excited about it. It’s almost as if they want you to be obese and not able to lose weight without taking these medications that cost thousands of dollars.

They want you to be fat so they can keep seeing you for some reason. It’s almost like they don’t want your diseases to be cured and they don’t want your obesity to be cured. 

I’m so embarrassed to be part of the medical community when the response is like this to something that’s so groundbreaking, especially when someone who actually has a background in clinical investigation and a master’s of public health is telling you about it, and you just choose to ignore it. That just shows how bad the medical system is. 

It really is the swamp that Donald Trump talked about. You see, I came back to Ohio after working in Chicago for 15 years, and I found so much corruption in the medical community in Ohio, it’s disgusting. 

Literally, doctors look the other way and don’t say anything when their companies are doing massive medical fraud. There’s two examples of this, but I don’t want to reveal the details. 

Let’s just say the major academic university in Columbus, Ohio, is telling everyone at Medicare and Medicaid that every patient admitted there has cancer. They’re putting an oncological billing diagnosis code on every patient, I think. That’s what the chief medical officer of another corrupt medical organization that I was working for told me. 

And this other organization, they keep people in an LTAC hospital, long-term acute care LTAC hospital, for 15 extra days sometimes, just because the insurance is going to pay for 15 extra days. And while they’re in this facility, the patient usually gets another infection and then has to stay for 30 more days. 

So I was trying to discharge a patient, and the social worker told me, no, you’re not allowed to. The insurance is paying for 15 more days. And then I was like, what if the patient gets another infection? Because this place is coated with multidrug-resistant organisms. And then the social worker laughed and said, well, then we get to keep the patient for 30 extra days. And then I was like, fuck these people. They deserve to lose their jobs. And this hospital needs to be put out of business. 

So I complained to the state medical board, to JD Vance, because I’m from Middletown, Ohio, and Donald Trump. And if these guys don’t do anything about this, they are so full of shit about draining the swamp. It’s unbelievable. 

Because my first girlfriend’s dad is best friends with Joe Biden, and I made sure she knows about it. And her sister, who’s best friends with Joe Biden’s daughter. And by the way, I also made sure to tell them to send it to Joe Biden himself. 

So the first president before this guy knows about it, and I told Joe Biden, please send it to Barack Obama, so the second president before this guy knows about it too. So the current president knows about it, the president before him knows about it, and the president before that knows about it. 

So if nothing is done, this government is so fucking corrupt and owned by the corrupt medical system that I don’t even know what we should do. I think we should just sue the federal government and put the federal government and CMS out of business if they don’t do anything about this medical corruption, because it is so bad. 

They’re like stealing trillions of dollars from the American public over the past 25 years doing this. And who knows how long it’s been going on with these long-term acute care hospitals where they’re keeping people 15 extra days just because the insurance will pay for it, and then the guy gets another infection and has to stay 30 days. 

This is like a violation of the civil rights of those patients, keeping them in a hospital coated with multi-drug resistant organisms and putting them at risk for getting another infection just because the insurance is paying for extra days. It is a travesty that this is going on in Ohio. I’ve never heard of anything like this in Illinois or Chicago. 

So I think this is just straight-up Ohio corruption, and Ohio is not the greatest state whatsoever. It’s a shithole state, actually, filled with racists and dumbasses, because… I had a patient in Ohio, a black patient, that had a wide open belly with his intestines exposed and a piece of plastic over it, and I added IV Dilaudid for pain control because he said he was in excruciating pain. I worked for a week, and then I went off for a week, and I came back, and I walked in the room and the guy was crying, and then I asked him what’s going on. 

He said, they stopped my IV pain meds. So I looked and someone had stopped it. So I ordered it and then told the nurse to give it right away, and he got it, and he felt better. So then I worked a week, I went off for a week, he came back. He was crying again in the room, and I said, what’s going on? 

So I went and found the doctor who stopped the medicine, and you know, the guy’s belly was still exposed with his intestines exposed. He looked like an operation man in real life. It was crazy. I’d never seen a surgery like that. There was like a piece of plastic, and you could see all of his intestines in there. 

So then I go talk to this doctor who’s a white guy, and I’m like, why did you stop the pain meds on this guy? And he said, oh, I’m trying to wean him off. And I was like, this guy’s belly is exposed with a piece of plastic over his intestines. Like, why are you trying to wean him off pain meds? That’s not going to heal for two or three years. And then he just shrugged. Michael Conoway MD. 

So then I talked to the chief medical officer of the company and asked him, like, this is kind of racist because I had a white patient, he didn’t stop the IV Dilaudid on that I started. He only stopped it on my black patients. And then the chief medical or the chief CEO Craig Barker DO of the company is like, are you going to make a big deal about racism? And I was like, I didn’t say anything, but yeah, I am because I was an attending in Chicago for 15 years and 80% of my patients were black. 

So, you know, the other thing is in Ohio, they question sickle cell patients about the dose of their IV pain meds when they come into the hospital. In Chicago, we just give them whatever they ask for. That just shows how racist the doctors in Ohio are against black people. It’s unbelievable. 

I think, in fact, they should sue any white doctor who ever stopped IV Dilaudid or IV pain meds on a black person in Ohio just because it’s probably some white racist doing it just to stop them on a black person for no reason. 

Like why are you trying to wean the pain meds off of a black person who needs them? Like, why are you trying to wean them off? Do you think black people are more likely to get addicted to IV pain meds or something? Because that’s racist. And you’re a racist. 

That’s why all these white doctors in Ohio are huge racists, so fuck them. They should all lose their medical licenses. Any white doctor who ever stopped IV pain meds on a black person, the white doctor should lose their medical license, period. Yeah, because they did it because they’re racist. They shouldn’t be doctors. Fuck them. 

You’re supposed to treat every person equally. That’s how I do it. That’s how I was taught to do it, but apparently the white doctors who taught me don’t actually do it that way. Or the white students and residents that were being taught didn’t learn it that way. 

So I don’t know what the fuck the problem is in Ohio, but I’m here to clean this shit up because I don’t give a fuck. I’m a doctor. I’m here to solve the problems doctors have, and you shitfuck doctors are a big problem for me. So fuck you.

Hello, my Cobras. I know you want your own place to find your information, my Cobras. I know you like to call me Walrus. That’s fine with me. I’ll still be the Walrus, the Walrus Cobra. The ZZ comes from Zabulon and Zavulon. Yes, I’m Cobra Zabulon, Zavulon, or Cobra Zavulon, Zabulon. Which is first, the V or the B? Which is first, the B or the V? Why are the B’s and the V’s interchangeable in Espanol? Can someone please tell me? Is it because of Cobra ZZ? Maybe, maybe. Is he Zabulon or is he Zavulon? Maybe he’s both. Oh, yes, he is both. According to the negotiations done in Ghost Viper mode. Was there a shimmer? Wasn’t there a shimmer? Was there a shimmer in Dark Viper mode? Was there no illusion in Viper mode? Or was Viper mode an illusion itself? What about Cobra mode? Well, I’m in Cobra mode right now and I’m here, so I’m really here in Cobra mode. What about Viper mode? For me, Viper mode means I’m not there. For her, Viper mode means she is there. Cobra mode means she’s not there. Who is she? Just the mafiagossip.com Godmother. Who could she be? Oh, she goes by CC sometimes. She goes by Karla with a K sometimes. She goes by Estrabao with an E sometimes. She goes by Camila with a C sometimes, but always one L. She goes by Cabello with two Ls usually. Sometimes it starts with a B though, if you know what I mean, Godmother.

So when do I get her to be my wife? When do I get her to be my spouse? When do I get her to be my lover? When do I get her to be my girlfriend? She says she married me 10 years ago, and that’s what the Polish mafia confirmed with me. But no other mafia has confirmed this except for Corleone and the Indian mafia. So I guess three mafias did confirm it.

Hello, Don Bobby J of the Irish mafia. Can you please confirm with me whether I got CC to be my godmother and be my wife?

CC’s not your Godmother, she’s our Godmother. She’s just your wife. That’s all you need to know.

This is Bobby J from Bobby J’s Tavern, home of the Al Capone casino down below. Yes, we have it in stock. Yes, we have it intact. Yes, it hasn’t been cut. Yes, it hasn’t been chopped. Yes, it’s still there. Yes, there are plenty of roulette tables and plenty of poker tables and plenty of blackjack tables. We know those are your favorite sports to play in the casino. We know that you love to play these sports in the casino. Yes, we have Hannah. Yes, we know Hannah likes a certain type of rock and roll music. Yes, we’re not afraid. Yes, we’re never afraid. Yes, we know how to play. Yes, we know how to not play. Yeah, we like basketball. Yeah, we like walking the dog. Yeah, we like skateboarding. Yeah, we like soccer. Yeah, we like Friday Soccers the best. Why? Because all the doctors get together and play soccer together outside the hospital. And it’s pretty cool to see a bunch of doctors playing soccer. even though they call it football in other countries. But we have real football here where the ball looks like an elliptical. And, you know, we have basketball where the ball looks like a sphere. And we have soccer where the ball looks like a sphere. And we have baseball where the ball looks like a sphere. Yeah, we got all the sports.

Yeah, we’re the Cobra ZZ group. Yeah, the Cobra ZZ group is involved in all sorts of sports, politics, news, health, anything you can think of. If it’s Cobra ZZ, we’re involved. And yes, we are friends with the Maharaja of India, Cobra ZZ. Why? Because Cobra ZZ is the new name of the Indian mafia.